Then there's always plenty of plankton in the ocean at the beach.
And, of course, don't forget pelicans, so we give you the plankton' pelican--
a post dedicated to punning, poetry, and all manner of lyin' of the innocent sort.
*The term plankton comes from Greek, planktos,
"errant," and leans toward the meaning of "wanderer."
*Pelican is related to to the Greek, pelekys "ax."
'Ax' not what this website can do for you but what you can do for this jabberwobblied jungle.;-)
What did the 3 pelicans say as they flew off from the roof of a Friends' meeting house in North Carolina?
Been there, dung that.;-)
Heard the story about the 'fun-gal' and the 'fun-guy'?
The couple, Gus and Gal, thought a great way to spend an evening was dining out on mushroom-stuffed cuisine.
"It's a lot of fun,Gus said;-).
The Quaker lady in Northwest Yearly Meeting endured her husband's groaning puns, but she had a bone to pick with him when he commented on her accidentally
banging her elbow (the funny bone) on his filing cabinet in their study.
For he laughed and said, That's very 'humerus.'
There in the urban lagoon
You are sitting drunk on Mountain Dew
Gabbled to the long-boarded bar
Waiting for another sotted-shot
Through your flapped brain,
One more mallard
For the boat-tender
First published in Word Riot,
also in Dark Energy,
2009 by Diminuendo Press
I scooped in one huge mouthful of savory chowder
Swimming with succulent salmon reconnoitering
Wild from Alaska—my taste buds buzzed into singing,
But the stupid phone in the kitchen rang, yanking me.
I dropped my creamy spoon and rushed through the open door--
Wrong number! Frustrated, I slammed down the white thing,
Tended to nagging errands clanging for attention;
But then heard a loud slurp ... slurping 'round the den corner.
Oh, no! I rushed back into the aromatic room
And there crouched Fizzy, our calico, her cream-rootbeer
Mugged head raised, pleased, above the scent-wafted white bowl,
Just "fin-ished"—her pink tongue wiping those smiling chops.
First pub. in vox poetica,
also in my book of previously published poems,
selah river, 2012
Heard about the Catholic-Mormon couple who had a large family of a dozen kids?
A negative neighbor criticized, "Haven't they heard of family planning?"
But another more philosophical neighbor with a bit of wit said,
"No, but they've heard of family planting!
They been spending lots of nights of sleeping together, dozin';-)"
"I've traveled all over America," Sam stated.
Ah, Bird Poop Van
Ah, bird poop van,
there in the far corner of the fast food lot
where wind-blown paper congregates,
and you squat against the curb,
a rusted Ford Econoline home,
spattered with a thousand puked starbursts
of smell on your dull finish,
a metal fadedness of has been.
Your owner in his tourist-trash hat
and long dirty hair hanging to his collar,
squats on the splattered grass,
grizzled before his future demise,
a throwback to Ashbury
where he used to panhandle.
He sits with his wilted wildflower
in her faded jeans splotched with patches,
sipping their mocha coffee on the matted grass
wary for the squad car to cruise by again,
and roust them out of their corner nest
under the gilded arches.
But, oh, you rest and rust so easy–
at least there are no fowl in sight.
First pub. in The Bicycle Review,
also in amphibi.us, Dead Snakes, and
No, Eve, I won't touch that apple," he said adamantly.
The So n' So Argument
A modern couple lives on the seismic line
This of Sam 'n Andrea as in the city, so summered
Of Gardena, you know, Ada-'n Eve-r on, oh so pummed
Their hysterical house divided down geological;
They argue and argue until at the crack of dawn
Displaced tension 'rictors' up through their disjunction,
Until, until...they both shout, bellow so loud, "So,
It's YOUR fault, not mine."
First pub. in Media Virus Magazine,
also in selah river
"My pet whale has died," Ahab blubbered.
Notice how ‘theoillogicalies’
Gum up the worded worlds
Stretchnosepuppet the truth
Jaw-chewing, teeth gnawing
It all out of shape
Are the ‘dickens-dammed,’
Undersides of study desks
Or our floored mind
First pub. in Poydras Review,
also in Dead Snakes and
"I used to be a pilot," George explained.
Playing 'Heir' Ball
Our historic cat coughed up
a wadded brown object,
that long-winding 'tail';
to your cultural
First pub. in The Clockwise Cat,
and in Dark Energy, my first book
of previously published poems,
2009 by Diminuendo Press
"She tore my valentine in two," said Romeo, halfheartedly.
of the absent-minded poet
who plunged his teeth
and flossed their toilet?
from Dark Energy,
"That's no pedigree; it's a mongrel," Tommy muttered.
"When I saw the snake, I became very upset and was rattled," said Martha.
Hugging his Friendly spouse, he whispered into her ear, "I love to camp with you," he said intently.
Has planking become an endangered species?
In the Light-hearted,
Saturday, October 22, 2016
Friday, October 14, 2016
Conjoined Twin Boys Successfully Separated in Rare Surgery
BY CHAR ADAMS•@CICIADAMS_
POSTED ON OCTOBER 14, 2016 AT 10:39AM EDT
Twin baby boys conjoined at the head were separated on Friday in a nearly day-long operation at a New York children’s hospital.
Thirteen-month-old twins Anias and Jadon McDonald were successfully separated at the Children’s Hospital at Montefiore Medical Center in the Bronx, and were undergoing reconstructive surgery...
“And then there were two,” the kids’ mother, Nicole McDonald, wrote in a Facebook post early Friday.
She added in a follow-up post: “TWO SEPARATE BABIES!!!...and yet I ache with the uncertainty of the future. I didn’t cry until the surgeon’s left the room. I was barely able to even utter the words “thank you” because of the pit that still sits heavy in my stomach. We are standing on the brink of a vast unknown.”
Dr. James Goodrich, who has now done seven craniopagus separation surgeries, led the risky procedure and broke the good news to Nicole and the boys’ father, Christian, around 3 a.m., CNN reports.
“Well, we did it,” he said, according to CNN. The surgery has taken at least 22 hours.
“When they told me they were wheeling Jadon up first, it took me a second to comprehend,” Nicole wrote in a Facebook post Friday morning.
“I actually asked why they rearranged the room because I hadn’t really internalized the idea that there would be 2 beds in here. Welcome back my sweet Jadon.
Happy rebirth day.
Anias is still in surgery believe it or not...
maybe 2 more hours.”
The journey to the separation has been a long, emotional one for the family. The parents had to decide whether to go through with the operation, even though the surgery included major risks like death or brain damage to the children.
“There was times where I just...didn’t want to go there and think about the fact that, you know, one or both...could maybe have a handicap or something like that,” Christian told CNN ahead of the surgery.
“I think now I’m at the point where I do that that is a possibility and, if that’s the case, It’s not gonna change anything. I mean, we’re still gonna love them. They’re our boys.”
Now, although the children have been separated successfully, the family has a long road ahead.
“The next few months will be critical in terms of recovery and we will not know for sure how Anias and Jadon are recovering for many weeks...So we just took a huge leap of faith, but now we are back to taking baby steps.”
The wonder of modern medicine and hope!
In the Light of Reason and Technology,
Thursday, October 13, 2016
Here's a baffling conundrum of modern society:
I have a complete lack of belief in
but I don't emphasize that I am an A-Muslim (a- means "without").
I have a complete lack of belief in
but I don't emphasize that I am an A-Calvinist-Augustinian!
So why do so many now
emphasize what they have a complete lack of belief in
that they are A-theists?
It reminds me of a short reflection by the astronomer,
Neil deGrasse Tyson,
“You know, the only ‘ist’ I am, is a scientist.
“It’s odd that the word ‘atheist’ even exists. I don’t play golf.
Is there a word for non-golf-players?
Do non-golf players gather and strategize?
Do non-skiers have a word and come together
and talk about the fact that they don’t ski?”
Atheists are now claiming that all human infants are Atheists at birth.
And I might add, are all infants at birth
A-Golfers, A-Skiers;-), etc.?
Thanks, Kurt V.
In Light-hearted satire against this weird Trumpped world,
Sunday, October 9, 2016
Monday, October 3, 2016
burned-over dreams in the rusted oil drum
behind our faded house of fallen child
midwest blown by dark thundered storm
hedged branches, clumped together on the lawn
waiting to become ashes wafted cumulus
piles of browned cuttings lost to history
yet writing stems up greening between
lined cracks in the disjointed concrete walk
behind our parsonage, weeds of wonder
between hard slabs of the displaced past
in front, raking my fallen memories up
shoving those windblown scatterings
off our green lawn, dumping them over
down into a gully-ditched pile
rising up, 3 feet of dry-colored splash
a crinkly mass of discarded leaving
bursting red-scarlet, yellow-gold, orange, and tan
for struggling kids-of-heart to jump in
First pub. in Words-Myth Magazine,
then in the poetry collection, Dark Energy
Diminuendo Press, Texas
Leaving Off Leaving
Leaving in the fall of harvested years
Dark colors shade and give to grayness,
Vibrant and vivid memories fade away
Scattering with the barren wind of winter;
The past burst of life firework-spangled
Now only falls dead embered and ashed,
Sometimes one last fizzle of brief autumn.
Leaving off leaving
Leaving behind our shining, aspiring dreams
Dark forebodings rise, failed hopes fragment,
Broken crumbling shale of envisioned plans
Crunch under the shifting strata of history;
Now only grit, gravel and dust remain, 'ore'
The grimmed remainders of old 'talings.'
Leaving off leaving
Leaving off these soul somber dirges, we go
Deeply inward to the eternal equator
Of the transcendent within our inner becoming
Where ‘psalms’ forever green in their vivid verdancy
Of that brilliant light that candled the cosmos;
Behind this anguished world so fallen to despair,
Shines forth one Ultimate’s ideal, the shimmering
Lodestar of illuminable-illimitable
Beauty and glorious perfection.
Leaving off leaving
Regrets--life's most wept weapings, keen,
Laments leafing we never stop shedding,
Streams flow ever ill-crease and redden
The puffy setting of our swollen eyes.
Our plummeting wailing into the dark catacombs
Of elder age like black matter, forgiven wrongs
And destroyed hopes refuse to leave our troubled self
Dimming the Light shining into becoming.
Leaving this leaving
Relentless remorse and despair cancers away
Morning from tearing up in geysered joy.
And we grieve our journey'd 'trial' to demise,
Our only hope the Everlasting Divine.
First pub. in the poetry
collection, selah river
In that fall of Nebraska's weather so dying,
Sun-jaded trees ungreened and thundered color
Reverberating the world, 'Gogh'ing to the limit;
They left tremoring rainbows burst earth-bound and shingled
In that wind--melted yellow, orange, and maroon,
Fingerpaints jagged, leaved in those black wrought branches;
Then with the stroke of more rogue northerly gusts,
The zagged etchings counter-wheeled in swirling emotion—
Hacking our senses, 'hueing' our minds until acrylic glazed--
And so reeled and rolled diagonally down in that kaleidoscoping Monet.
First pub. in The Write Side Up
and Dark Energy poetry collection
In the Light,
Saturday, October 1, 2016
a true account for when you are overwhelmed, when events are going wrong,
from Swanee Hunt:
"Sophia...an old woman...lived in a little town in Croatia.
Every day she had one job, to go at noon to the church, to take the ropes
that were tied up on the wall, untie them, pull on the ropes,
and ring the bells in the tower.
During the war [Serbia-Kosovo-Croatian War] in village after village, when the Serb forces came in tanks, they would shoot up all the houses of the Catholics, the Croats, and then they would end up at the church.
They would go to the church and shoot up the church. At the very end they would shoot the tower.
Then they would roll out, and it would now be a Serb town.
This old woman whose church had been shot up, every day you would find her in the churchyard at noon.
There was wood splintered everywhere, but in the middle of the debris, the big bell
that had been in the bell tower
was lying on its side on the ground.
Sophia, this eighty-year-old woman,
was bent over with her old gnarled hands
grasping the clapper
and swinging her arms,
I carry Sophia inside of me,
and I hope you will.
No matter what the circumstances
in which you are working,
in which you are living,
your job is to keep
your hands on that clapper,
ringing the bell."
by Swanee Hunt, diplomat, ambassador, founder of Hunt Alternative Fund,
for advancing innovative and inclusive approaches to social change
at local, national, and global levels, and professor at Harvard
from Global Values 101: A Short Course Edited by Kate Holbrook,
Ann S. Kim, Brian Palmer, Anna Portnoy
Remember the classic words:
No man is an island,
Entire of itself.
Each is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less.
Each man's death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.
by John Dunne
And here's a little throw-away punning for those who need a laugh,
as well as a wing and a prayer:
To misquote the old Zen question--
What is the sound of one hand clappering?
In the light of hope and truth,
Friday, September 30, 2016
A statement from British Quakers concerned for peace in the Middle East:
Working for peace, opposing war
"Quakers in Britain work for peace. We are led by our faith to reject “outward weapons", turning instead to those of the spirit. As a faith community our religious understanding and experience is that true peace cannot be imposed by military might. Ideas cannot be removed with bombs."
"There are both moral and pragmatic reasons to oppose military action in Syria. Bombs dropped from the air not only kill indiscriminately, they further increase the risk of terrorist retribution. Security comes from building peace not from supplying weapons. It comes from welcoming refugees fleeing war rather than erecting fences."
"Take action now."
"It is human nature that the closer suffering comes to us, the more acutely we feel the pain and grief. But that experience should sensitise us to the suffering caused repeatedly by acts of war and violent crime in more distant places, including Beirut, Sinai, Bamako and Aleppo. It should strengthen our determination to build a safer world together."
"The military actions of Western nations recruit more people to the cause than they kill. Every bomb dropped is a recruitment poster for [Islamic State], a rallying point for the young, vulnerable and alienated. And every bomb dropped on Syrian cities drives yet more people to flee and seek refuge in safer countries."
"Our political leaders seem determined that Britain should look strong on the world stage."
"Quakers in Britain believe our country should act with wisdom and far-sighted courage.
A wisdom that rises above the temptation to respond to every problem with military might."
"A wisdom that looks back at our failures in Libya and Iraq and Afghanistan
and learns from experience. The courage – and strength - to think through
the likely consequences of actions to find a long term, lasting solution."
"Although there are no quick or easy answers, there are things we can do, all of us together, which will defeat
the terrorists [and the Syrian Government, Saudi Arabian government instigators, etc.] more assuredly than military action."
"We can quieten ourselves and listen to the truth from deep within us that speaks of love, mutual respect, humanity and peace."
"We can and will refuse to be divided. By bridge-building among faiths and within our local communities we can challenge and rise above the ideologies of hate and actively love our neighbour."
"By welcoming refugees, we can not only meet the acute needs of those individuals but also undercut the narrative of those who seek to create fear and mistrust."
"And we can ask our political leaders to:
Treat terrorist acts as crimes, not acts of war
Stop arming any of the parties fighting in Syria
Observe international law and apply it equally to all parties
Build cooperation among nations, strengthening those international institutions which contribute to peace
Export peace rather than war, so that we can create the conditions the world needs to address its most serious problems, including climate change."
"...from a statement made by Quakers in Britain in 1943 (Quaker faith & practice 24.09):
“True peace cannot be dictated, it can only be built in co-operation between all peoples. None of us, no nation, no citizen, is free from some responsibility for this."
"The UK and NATO allies must stop arming and financing any of the parties
fighting in Syria, before we can expect that others do the same."
Is your Friends Meeting, or other human rights organization working to oppose this war
in which more than 350,000 have been killed and many injured, and millions refugeed?
Please write your governmental representatives to oppose this mass slaughter.
Make a visible witness.
In the LIGHT,