Remember those PLANKING days, that ridiculous fad a few years back?
The contented 'sole' like the company sign says.
No, I'm not board at Mt. Hood, just planking.
Another case of an endangered species, but which one?
Lewis and Clark thinks something smells and looks fishy, probably sea plankton on top of the steelhead fish.
Pelicanplank at Pacific Beach, San Diego
In the Laughter,
Dan Wilcox
Musings on Ultimate Reality, ethics, religion, social history, literature, media, and art
Showing posts with label planking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label planking. Show all posts
Thursday, June 10, 2021
Saturday, October 22, 2016
Q.C.Humor #12: Remember Planking?
Remember planking?
Then there's always plenty of plankton in the ocean at the beach.
And, of course, don't forget pelicans, so we give you the plankton' pelican--
a post dedicated to punning, poetry, and all manner of lyin' of the innocent sort.
*The term plankton comes from Greek, planktos,
"errant," and leans toward the meaning of "wanderer."
*Pelican is related to to the Greek, pelekys "ax."
-
'Ax' not what this website can do for you but what you can do for this jabberwobblied jungle.;-)
-
What did the 3 pelicans say as they flew off from the roof of a Friends' meeting house in North Carolina?
Been there, dung that.;-)
-
Heard the story about the 'fun-gal' and the 'fun-guy'?
The couple, Gus and Gal, thought a great way to spend an evening was dining out on mushroom-stuffed cuisine.
"It's a lot of fun,Gus said;-).
-
The Quaker lady in Northwest Yearly Meeting endured her husband's groaning puns, but she had a bone to pick with him when he commented on her accidentally
banging her elbow (the funny bone) on his filing cabinet in their study.
For he laughed and said, That's very 'humerus.'
Anon.
__
Sitting Duck
There in the urban lagoon
You are sitting drunk on Mountain Dew
Gabbled to the long-boarded bar
Waiting for another sotted-shot
To blast
Through your flapped brain,
One more mallard
For the boat-tender
-Daniel Wilcox
First published in Word Riot,
also in Dark Energy,
2009 by Diminuendo Press
__
Clammy Chops
I scooped in one huge mouthful of savory chowder
Swimming with succulent salmon reconnoitering
Wild from Alaska—my taste buds buzzed into singing,
But the stupid phone in the kitchen rang, yanking me.
I dropped my creamy spoon and rushed through the open door--
Wrong number! Frustrated, I slammed down the white thing,
Tended to nagging errands clanging for attention;
But then heard a loud slurp ... slurping 'round the den corner.
Oh, no! I rushed back into the aromatic room
And there crouched Fizzy, our calico, her cream-rootbeer
Mugged head raised, pleased, above the scent-wafted white bowl,
Just "fin-ished"—her pink tongue wiping those smiling chops.
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in vox poetica,
also in my book of previously published poems,
selah river, 2012
__
Heard about the Catholic-Mormon couple who had a large family of a dozen kids?
A negative neighbor criticized, "Haven't they heard of family planning?"
But another more philosophical neighbor with a bit of wit said,
"No, but they've heard of family planting!
They been spending lots of nights of sleeping together, dozin';-)"
Anon.
___
"I've traveled all over America," Sam stated.
Anon.
___
Ah, Bird Poop Van
Ah, bird poop van,
there in the far corner of the fast food lot
where wind-blown paper congregates,
and you squat against the curb,
a rusted Ford Econoline home,
spattered with a thousand puked starbursts
of smell on your dull finish,
a metal fadedness of has been.
Your owner in his tourist-trash hat
and long dirty hair hanging to his collar,
squats on the splattered grass,
grizzled before his future demise,
a throwback to Ashbury
where he used to panhandle.
He sits with his wilted wildflower
in her faded jeans splotched with patches,
sipping their mocha coffee on the matted grass
wary for the squad car to cruise by again,
and roust them out of their corner nest
under the gilded arches.
But, oh, you rest and rust so easy–
at least there are no fowl in sight.
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in The Bicycle Review,
also in amphibi.us, Dead Snakes, and
selah river
__
No, Eve, I won't touch that apple," he said adamantly.
Anon.
__
The So n' So Argument
A modern couple lives on the seismic line
This of Sam 'n Andrea as in the city, so summered
Of Gardena, you know, Ada-'n Eve-r on, oh so pummed
Their hysterical house divided down geological;
They argue and argue until at the crack of dawn
Displaced tension 'rictors' up through their disjunction,
Until, until...they both shout, bellow so loud, "So,
It's YOUR fault, not mine."
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in Media Virus Magazine,
also in selah river
__
"My pet whale has died," Ahab blubbered.
Anon.
__
Gum Up
Notice how ‘theoillogicalies’
Gum up the worded worlds
Stretchnosepuppet the truth
Tongue-twisting
Jaw-chewing, teeth gnawing
It all out of shape
And
Are the ‘dickens-dammed,’
Bubblegummed worst
To remove
From
Undersides of study desks
Or our floored mind
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in Poydras Review,
also in Dead Snakes and
selah river
__
"I used to be a pilot," George explained.
Anon.
__
Playing 'Heir' Ball
Our historic cat coughed up
a wadded brown object,
thumb-sized
and yarned...
Ah forget
that long-winding 'tail';
go pell-mell
to your cultural
memory--
what was
your latest
cough-up?
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in The Clockwise Cat,
and in Dark Energy, my first book
of previously published poems,
2009 by Diminuendo Press
__
"She tore my valentine in two," said Romeo, halfheartedly.
Anon.
___
confused poet
ever hear
of the absent-minded poet
who plunged his teeth
and flossed their toilet?
-Daniel Wilcox
from Dark Energy,
Diminuendo Press
___
"That's no pedigree; it's a mongrel," Tommy muttered.
--
"When I saw the snake, I became very upset and was rattled," said Martha.
Anon.
__
Hugging his Friendly spouse, he whispered into her ear, "I love to camp with you," he said intently.
__
Has planking become an endangered species?
In the Light-hearted,
Daniel Wilcox
Then there's always plenty of plankton in the ocean at the beach.
And, of course, don't forget pelicans, so we give you the plankton' pelican--
a post dedicated to punning, poetry, and all manner of lyin' of the innocent sort.
*The term plankton comes from Greek, planktos,
"errant," and leans toward the meaning of "wanderer."
*Pelican is related to to the Greek, pelekys "ax."
-
'Ax' not what this website can do for you but what you can do for this jabberwobblied jungle.;-)
-
What did the 3 pelicans say as they flew off from the roof of a Friends' meeting house in North Carolina?
Been there, dung that.;-)
-
Heard the story about the 'fun-gal' and the 'fun-guy'?
The couple, Gus and Gal, thought a great way to spend an evening was dining out on mushroom-stuffed cuisine.
"It's a lot of fun,Gus said;-).
-
The Quaker lady in Northwest Yearly Meeting endured her husband's groaning puns, but she had a bone to pick with him when he commented on her accidentally
banging her elbow (the funny bone) on his filing cabinet in their study.
For he laughed and said, That's very 'humerus.'
Anon.
__
Sitting Duck
There in the urban lagoon
You are sitting drunk on Mountain Dew
Gabbled to the long-boarded bar
Waiting for another sotted-shot
To blast
Through your flapped brain,
One more mallard
For the boat-tender
-Daniel Wilcox
First published in Word Riot,
also in Dark Energy,
2009 by Diminuendo Press
__
Clammy Chops
I scooped in one huge mouthful of savory chowder
Swimming with succulent salmon reconnoitering
Wild from Alaska—my taste buds buzzed into singing,
But the stupid phone in the kitchen rang, yanking me.
I dropped my creamy spoon and rushed through the open door--
Wrong number! Frustrated, I slammed down the white thing,
Tended to nagging errands clanging for attention;
But then heard a loud slurp ... slurping 'round the den corner.
Oh, no! I rushed back into the aromatic room
And there crouched Fizzy, our calico, her cream-rootbeer
Mugged head raised, pleased, above the scent-wafted white bowl,
Just "fin-ished"—her pink tongue wiping those smiling chops.
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in vox poetica,
also in my book of previously published poems,
selah river, 2012
__
Heard about the Catholic-Mormon couple who had a large family of a dozen kids?
A negative neighbor criticized, "Haven't they heard of family planning?"
But another more philosophical neighbor with a bit of wit said,
"No, but they've heard of family planting!
They been spending lots of nights of sleeping together, dozin';-)"
Anon.
___
"I've traveled all over America," Sam stated.
Anon.
___
Ah, Bird Poop Van
Ah, bird poop van,
there in the far corner of the fast food lot
where wind-blown paper congregates,
and you squat against the curb,
a rusted Ford Econoline home,
spattered with a thousand puked starbursts
of smell on your dull finish,
a metal fadedness of has been.
Your owner in his tourist-trash hat
and long dirty hair hanging to his collar,
squats on the splattered grass,
grizzled before his future demise,
a throwback to Ashbury
where he used to panhandle.
He sits with his wilted wildflower
in her faded jeans splotched with patches,
sipping their mocha coffee on the matted grass
wary for the squad car to cruise by again,
and roust them out of their corner nest
under the gilded arches.
But, oh, you rest and rust so easy–
at least there are no fowl in sight.
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in The Bicycle Review,
also in amphibi.us, Dead Snakes, and
selah river
__
No, Eve, I won't touch that apple," he said adamantly.
Anon.
__
The So n' So Argument
A modern couple lives on the seismic line
This of Sam 'n Andrea as in the city, so summered
Of Gardena, you know, Ada-'n Eve-r on, oh so pummed
Their hysterical house divided down geological;
They argue and argue until at the crack of dawn
Displaced tension 'rictors' up through their disjunction,
Until, until...they both shout, bellow so loud, "So,
It's YOUR fault, not mine."
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in Media Virus Magazine,
also in selah river
__
"My pet whale has died," Ahab blubbered.
Anon.
__
Gum Up
Notice how ‘theoillogicalies’
Gum up the worded worlds
Stretchnosepuppet the truth
Tongue-twisting
Jaw-chewing, teeth gnawing
It all out of shape
And
Are the ‘dickens-dammed,’
Bubblegummed worst
To remove
From
Undersides of study desks
Or our floored mind
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in Poydras Review,
also in Dead Snakes and
selah river
__
"I used to be a pilot," George explained.
Anon.
__
Playing 'Heir' Ball
Our historic cat coughed up
a wadded brown object,
thumb-sized
and yarned...
Ah forget
that long-winding 'tail';
go pell-mell
to your cultural
memory--
what was
your latest
cough-up?
-Daniel Wilcox
First pub. in The Clockwise Cat,
and in Dark Energy, my first book
of previously published poems,
2009 by Diminuendo Press
__
"She tore my valentine in two," said Romeo, halfheartedly.
Anon.
___
confused poet
ever hear
of the absent-minded poet
who plunged his teeth
and flossed their toilet?
-Daniel Wilcox
from Dark Energy,
Diminuendo Press
___
"That's no pedigree; it's a mongrel," Tommy muttered.
--
"When I saw the snake, I became very upset and was rattled," said Martha.
Anon.
__
Hugging his Friendly spouse, he whispered into her ear, "I love to camp with you," he said intently.
__
Has planking become an endangered species?
In the Light-hearted,
Daniel Wilcox
Labels:
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planting,
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salmon,
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Word Riot
Tuesday, August 23, 2016
Monads, Quarks, Planks, Patterns, "I," and God
To use turns of phrases--
What’s in a name?
Why speak of a prank, er. a plank?
Names and terms change meaning, often from generation to generation, but sometimes within months.
Which is more real, an object/fact or a pattern/process?
What’s God got to do with it?
“Imagine your uncle died and in his will he left you his beloved old wooden boat. You love your uncle and out of respect for him you decide that you’re going to fix up his old boat, making it good as new."
"And so you start with the hull, replacing old boards with new ones. But as you work rebuilding the hull, you realize that the deck needs replacing as well. And so the next year, you remove all of the boards on the deck and replace them with new ones, plank by plank, until the boat has an entirely new deck."
"But spending all that time working on the deck convinces you that the hardware isn’t reliable; you’re not sure which pieces would work if you were to actually start the boat, and which would snap with the slightest strain. And so you set out to replace all of the hardware..."
"If you keep this up, at some point you will have replaced the entire boat, and yet when you take your friends out for a ride, you will tell them that this is the boat your uncle left you in his will."
"The enduring reality of the boat, then, is in the pattern, not the planks."
"The planks come and go, but the pattern remains."
Rob Bell
Objects, things, facts, cells, atoms and so forth come and go.
But patterns remain...well they come and go, too, but they usually last longer in one 'place' than cells.
Bell, again:
"You are a pattern, moving through time, constantly changing and yet precisely consistent. Some have said we’re like ‘light at the end of a spinning stick.’”
Rob Bell
-What We Talk About When We Talk About God(3)
Think about what Bell said. It’s so true.(4)
From scientists, facts about 'you':
"Your Body is Younger Than You..."
"Whatever your age, your body is many years younger. In fact, even if you're middle aged, most of you may be just 10 years old or less."
"The cells lining the stomach, as mentioned, last only five days."
"The epidermis, or surface layer of the skin, is recycled every two weeks or so."
"An adult human liver probably has a turnover time of 300 to 500 days."
Markus Grompe, an expert on the liver's stem cells,
Oregon Health & Science University
The entire human skeleton is thought to be replaced every 10 years or so...
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/08/02/science/your-body-is-younger-than-you-think.html
"Your body is constantly replacing old cells with new ones at the rate of millions per second. By the time you finish reading this sentence,
50 million of your cells will have died and been replaced by others..."(5)
--
"In a year, 98 percent of the atoms in us now will be replaced by other atoms that we take in, in our air, food and drink. So that means 98 percent of me is new - every year...If you eat a hamburger one day, then the atoms and molecules in that hamburger will end up making up your cell walls and different organs and tissues."(6)
So does that mean, I'm long gone?
No.
Despite all of these changes in my body in the last 70 years
(I wonder how many atoms from Wild Alaskan Salmon), I'm still me--
different "planks,"
different cells,
different atoms,
but still my same consciousness of self.
Glad to meet you, my name is I-Process;-)
I am still becoming at this very moment, even in the midst of my receding into old age.
My conscious, creative awareness transcends my physical body.
"Since we moderns are accustomed to thinking in materialistic terms, and assuming that the human body is somehow the most real aspect of humanness,
we are caught off balance by the claim that what is most distinctively human is, in fact, independent of the body...
a process which is essentially independent of any one of us."
Dwight Brown, UU minister
I exist in that stream of consciousness, moral choice, and creative endeavor. We all are a part of a creative process in which we get to participate for a very brief span of time. We are the opposite of puppets; we can be creators.
What is happening is far more than matter--trillions of atoms--moving around.
We as finite creatures, become aware, can knowingly participate and bring changes to existence.
So the materialists are wrong.(4,7)
Monads, quarks, and atoms don't drive us like shot bullets.
Contrary to what most atheists say, consciousness isn't only the result of millions cells
hard-determined at the tail ends
of 14 billion-long puppet strings.
Unlike plant biologist Anthony Cashmore's claim that we humans are "bags of chemicals" and have no more choice than "bacterium" or a "bowl of sugar,"
other scientists strongly disagree.
For instance, Jeffrey M. Schwartz, M.D. and Rebecca Gladding, M.D. both
wrote an entire book explaining the exact opposite:
You Are Not Your Brain
Schwartz is a research psychiatrist at the UCLA School of Medicine and Gladding is a psychiatrist at the UCLA Resnick Neuropsychiatric Hospital and the Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior. They are authorities in field of neuroplasticity.
--
Consciousness is an aware process that enables each of us intelligent primates to transcend our circumstances, to change our behavior, to seek new goals, choose good ethics.
We are sentient beings, able to take situations and things--and through new combinations of ideas, methods, and actions--to bring new ways into existence that never existed before.
Consciousness enables individuals to make creative choices, not repeat the same unjust, immoral actions of humans in the past,
whether the dysfunctional behavior of an alcoholic father or that of exacting revenge against a different human group by one's 50,000 years-past ancestor.
Consider one last analogy.
The squiggles on this virtual page are made up of pixels like the body of mine is made up of cells. But the squiggles don't determine what I write.
I do.
I as a conscious creator do that.
Then squiggles (with their attached meaning) follow.
The same is true of atoms and cells.
They don't determine whether or not I choose to do wrong or right.
But when I decide to send money for the impoverished refugees of Syria,
OR
when I decide to squander my money on things I don't need,
then the cells and atoms of my hand go into action, pulling out my credit card.
Our future is hope
because we can influence that future, not yet here.
We aren't "bags of chemicals" fated by senseless energy, going no where for no purpose.
We can create poems, digital art, construct beautiful buildings, send probes on 10-year missions to Jupiter and beyond, and make many other significant differences.
That's what Enlightenment theism means.
Openness!
Openness to God-- to speak of friendship with God, to love the good, true, just, and beautiful.
Now speaking of God--
The Divine Process
The Ultimate Becoming
To be continued--
In the Light,
Daniel Wilcox
1 monad: According to Hippolytus, the worldview was inspired by the Pythagoreans, who called the first thing that came into existence the "monad."
2 quark: "any one of several types of very small particles that make up matter" M-W Dictionary
3 Too often in new books, Rob Bell is too new agey. You finish one of his books, which is delicious to our readership taste, but at its end all that’s left in one's mind is mostly a cotton-candy afterward.
Sugar and air.
And throw a away a sticky stick.
No substance, except unusual word placement on the page, and fleeting good feelings.
But with this plank-not-dumb story, Bell struck gold, the sugar-load.
4 Well at least to most people, though not for the Sam Harris atheists of the world who claim that every person’s “I” (each of one of us) is an illusion, that the only reality are atoms determined since the Big Bang.
And such determinists state that if you harmed another person, you would always commit such abuse again, even if you had a chance to face that ethical moment a “trillion” times because you as a person have no real choice.
Your every thought and every action are totally determined, lockstepsecular-fated.
It's “tumors-all-the-way-down” claims Harris in his most fatalistic example.
Harris: "If determinism is true, the future is set—and this includes all our future states of mind and our subsequent behavior...each of us is moved by chance and necessity, just as a marionette is set dancing on its strings."
"There is no combination of these truths that seems compatible with the popular notion of free will."
5 http://www.sciencemuseum.org.uk/whoami/findoutmore/yourbody/whatdoyourcellsdo/howoftenareyourcellsreplaced
6 Copyright © 2007 NPR. All rights reserved. Visit our website terms of use and permissions pages at www.npr.org for further information.
http://www.npr.org/templates/transcript/transcript.php?storyId=11893583
7 "You, your joys and your sorrows, your memories and your ambitions, your sense of personal identity and free will, are in fact no more than the behavior of a vast assembly of nerve cells and their associated molecules."
Francis Crick
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